Marcus Incorporating Quotes

“We don’t have an eternity

to realize our dreams,

only the time we are here.”

-       Susan L. Taylor

No. We do have an eternity. Many times, our dreams are limited by the realities of this life but there is much more to strive for in the afterlife. All prayers are answered in due time; however, this timeline spans the eternities. Although we may not receive answers to prayers in this life, we will in the next. Although we may not accomplish dreams in this life, we can in the next. I refuse to accept that we don’t have an eternity. Promises between God and ourselves extend passed the boundaries of mortality.

There are some blessings and promises preserved by God that are bestowed after mortality. Even Jesus Christ, our Savior, understood this while conversing with the thieves on the cross. Asking Him to come off the cross if he should be the Son of God, Jesus “withstood that ploy knowing in due time every knee would bow”.(Matt. 27:40) It would not be during the life of Christ that every knee would bow, but over the course of eternities. There is a time after his mortality that this prophecy would occur – a blessing preserved by God.

I believe in creating our own timeline. There are unique social pressures that tell us when we should graduate college, how much money we should be making at a certain age, etc. Even within religious organizations timelines exist on when or how long we should serve our Savior or when one should get married after “X” amount of time. Nevertheless, these timelines are constraints on a natural form of progression. At our own pace, we will all rise:

“I believe in the Sun even when it does not shine… God will make it happen in due time.” – Matt Matherne

Buckets's Leavitt/Hoiland

So sadly I was unable to attend class on Monday (French tests are the worst), so I cannot speak of Leavitt's heart that so many of you have been able to, but you could tell that she truly speaks from the heart in her writing, and that she floats with her imagery and her style. Additionally, my current proximity to Paradise Lost (I'm doing deep study of it in a class right now) made the references to Milton's work even more intriguing. I doubt that there is so much of the syntactic, critical, allegorical play in referencing Paradise Lost (though Paradise Lost does plenty of that in itself), but I like the idea that Leavitt runs perpendicular and parallel to Milton, and not just the book. Milton became blind later in his life and drew up a connection between him and Homer. Leavitt argues about the blindness of her previous predicament, and now her clarity has allowed her to reflect on that time.

In One Hundred Birds Taught Me to Fly, a sentence from the closing paragraph about her sister, Sage, and their relationship.
"As a teenager growing up in the heart of Mormon culture, I worried that my sister would never find any peace the further she diverged from the familiar path laid out by the church. I worried for her in the same way I worried for the girl from my high school whose parents drank wine."
This call to naivety and its personal pitfalls. This passage intrigued me because it showed a woke understanding of perspective, but also showed that this symptom is so common that it can be easily permissible, and even still with her. I enjoy how throughout the book she offers wisdom and observance without pride, often sounding just as approachable as a friend. I want to offer that in my own personal essay, but also when I talk to people in general. It's the type of ethos that lasts much longer than a blaring trumpet in someone's face.

Siera's Leavitt/Hoiland Post

The form is what really made "My Book of Life by Angel". First, because of they way it made you move as a reader. I felt instantly caught up in the story, because the form flowed so quickly. Second, because the poetic form allowed things to be left to the imagination, which in some ways made it worse. It kinda set the tone, something that is done in secret and not really talked about, in form that isn't explicit in what it is talking about.

I really like the entry on page 25 about her father. She uses such great character description. She describes by his sill childhood actions (and then goes back full circle to that at the end), a story about his life being preserved, and then his decision not to go on a mission. She tells the story of her dad coming back to the church in a way that not only helps us know that she had a father that was re-activated and a mother that wasn't a member, but also we come to know who her father is and what he means to her. I think in my own personal essay I can use descriptions about peoples lives in order to explain my circumstances, instead of just stating them straight out. 

Julie's Leavitt/Hoiland Post

I loved it when Martine Leavitt explained during our interview with her that one of the reasons she used poetry as the form in My Book of Life by Angel was that she and the reader could distance themselves from the narrative and focus more on the language. She deliberately used form as a tool so that she could write about a topic that is difficult for people to openly discuss. That was a powerful example to me of someone who knows how to expertly use literary techniques to bring across a message.

In Hoiland's essay "Twelve Times I Prayed," I loved how she used her journey through the forest as a symbolic representation of her own journey and facing her loneliness. While in the forest, she described the warm feeling that came over her as "a mother's love. An ancient love that flowered deep inside the furthest recesses of my mind and heart and moved through all of me to that very spot where I stood. . . . Being in the forest . . . felt like a mother I've always known" (13). While the concept of a Heavenly Mother is a sensitive and sacred topic, Hoiland was still able to respect the sacredness of that topic by seeing the manifestation of her Heavenly Mother's love in the simple things in nature. She used descriptions of nature that provided insight into her own beliefs. Like Hoiland, I want to be able to manipulate setting in my own personal essay in a way that it reflects my own internal journey and beliefs.

Kendal's Leavitt/Hoiland

I loved reading Leavitt's book. In fact, it is what has sparked yet again my love for reading. It has been a long time since I have wanted to read just to read because I enjoy it. The fact that the book was written in verse made the reading more light and more enjoyable. I love poetry so, it was lovely. While I was reading it, I was kind of shocked that we were assigned to read it for class as I considered the content. After listening to the author speak about her work, I understood the morality of it all. She's an advocate for homeless people and homeless girls. By telling this girl's story, she not only spreads awareness, but also sheds light on the hope that comes through enduring and doing what's right no matter the situation.

As for this new reading, a passage that is sticking with me is that of the graveyard starting on page 8. She just kind of jumps into the scene there in the cemetery. This goes back to the concept of in redias reis like Shakespeare does. This type of form reminds me of how the thought process goes. We are reminded of things and our mind gets going without any background really until the analysis begins in the middle of the writing when it is relevant. Cleaning up gravestones and whatnot moves to the fact that she was with her children out of the country. Those layers are really interesting to me. I think  I would like to try that in my writing. Starting my writing in this creative way would be something I would try.

Cassie's Martine Leavitt / Hoiland

I loved My Book of Life by Angel and getting to listen to the author talk about it was a treat. There was a lot that she said that I found really interesting. I thought her response to questions about symbolism were interesting in how she said that she doesn't write with symbolism in mind but that it grows out of the images that she focuses on. I think that's something we've discussed in class with the personal essays. That the images can really speak for themselves and take on a whole meaning of their own. I also liked when she talked about how it was a challenging blessing to write about something so tragic but that in the end it brought her joy and a sense of love. I thought that was a beautiful essence of the bold writing we had experimented with a little bit.

I've read 100 Birds Taught Me to Fly a couple of times now and it is probably one of my favorite books. At least it's probably the book that I credit with saving my testimony. I think this is because of how honest she is when explaining her life. She really shows you how she feels, but she doesn't ever try to get me to agree with her. That was a refreshing perspective. Because I felt like her story is so similar to my story, but I think it's because of the way she meanders through images and doesn't try to over-intellectualize her feelings. She seems to take them as they come and be really authentic to what she sees and feels. 

Dorothy Leavitt / Hoiland

I loved the opportunity we had to meet Martine Leavitt. Hearing her personal connection to the topics that she addresses in her books make it seem crucial for writers to use their voices and address topics that are relevant to them. While her subject matter was heavy and at times overwhelming to recognize the realities of how others live, it also helps one as a reader to develop a greater sense of empathy. I appreciated her honesty in sharing how difficult it was for her to write in free verse. While conveying an entire story with characters and depth in this way is difficult, it addresses an unpleasant topic in a more simplistic light. I think that this would be an interesting project to attempt to encapsulate a story or feeling through free verse. I also liked how she did not focus on didacticism , but rather let the reader interpret it in their own individual way. I think this is a useful element to incorporate in any type of religious writing. 

I liked the two sections on first impressions and second impressions about Hoiland's relationship to those that she did not necessarily care for. This perspective of delving deeper into one's life when immediate appreciation or connection is made, is something that Christ repeated in His life. Instead of walking past those that others frowned down upon, He stopped and loved them. Her positive memories of the people that she is was unsure of at first, put into perspective the critical message that everyone is a child of God and has the light of Christ. This passage also resonated with me because I saw so much of my own mother in it. Her ability to focus on someone's positive attributes has influenced me as I also try to look for the best in others. Again, Hoiland takes smaller details that have resonated with her to explore her relationship with others. 

Leavitt / Hoiland Response

Response to My Book of Life by Angel:

I thought that it was a fascinating experience, meeting with Martine Leavitt as a class. In relation to Angel’s spirituality, I asked Mrs. Leavitt how much of Angel’s experiences were realistic and how much were her own reverberations from an LDS faith? She responded with something along the lines of, “when I was doing my research, I found that these young girls were deeply spiritual, not religious, but spiritual.” Mrs. Leavitt then responded with a time of when she was researching the book, she worked in a kitchen with an older woman who was a prostitute and found deep connection with her. It seemed as though Martine almost couldn’t believe that this woman was involved in it. She seemed so human. Mrs. Leavitt then continued with, “though they are deeply spiritual, when I was writing the book, I knew that I wanted Angel to see an angel before the book was complete, so that was my part.” This book really impacted me as the reader, yes it was fiction, but written in a poetic form, the style really elevated these girls as discussed in the interview. It opened my mind to the idea that these women who are emotionally and sometimes physically bound to the trade aren’t horrible sinners, but struggling women that have been taken advantage of. Women that are starving for help, but cannot break free. Women that undergo awful and traumatic experiences that I wouldn’t wish upon anyone. My Book of Life by Angel, struck a spot in my heart, opening the door of recognition, that these unfortunate women are here in the United States, maybe even in Provo, UT. A place that for some is a sanctuary, for others must be a living hell.

One of the stories that really stood out to me from Hoiland’s One Hundred Birds Taught Me To Fly was under the subheading: Grace. Hoiland addresses an issue that can be considered controversial in the church – that is some church members look down upon, even criticize those who stop attending church. Often inactivity creates separation in what was a strong family as some have difficulty accepting their loved one’s choices. I appreciated the technique Hoiland used to illustrate why her sister Sage stopped attending church. She explains that nearly a decade previously her sister, “moved away [from the church] slowly, almost imperceptibly, after the disappointment of passing on the sacrament trays without being able to lift anything to her lips for too many Sundays left her feeling hopeless and rebellious” (Hoiland 39). She then describes the innocence of their childhood, bringing back fun and nostalgic memories to when the girls were young. She subsequently shifts to the inner struggles her sister had growing up: the battle with anorexia, the drugs, the antireligious boyfriend. She introduces the character of their loving parents and the blindness the excessively trustful eye of religion brings. Hoiland doesn’t seem to hide the flaws of being a religious parent. Her sister’s choices early in life led to limited participation in family events such as baby blessing, temple attendance, wedding participation, etc. The hurt that her sister must have felt is at the forefront of her story. Where many LDS members might look at this girl and condemn her inactivity in the Church, Hoiland plunges deeper, allows readers to really connect, to understand her sisters story, turning feelings of contempt into love. My favorite quote from this story was when she said, “I am embarrassed now to think that I ever questioned the happiness of another because it did not match perfectly my own, but my young heart was not ready to understand that the thread between my sister and me would not even waver let alone break, in the years to follow, even when our lives looked different (Hoiland 41-42). This solidifies her case, and becomes a non-direct didactic moment with whom LDS readers can identify. I’d like to model this tactic of personal lessons learned.

Leavitt/Hoilland Response

Firstly, I thought Martine Leavitt was a lovely, lovely woman. Meeting her helped me to understand her purpose in writing My Book of Life By Angel, which I honestly struggled with. Despite the novel's lack of explicit content, the implicit situations described within the book made me very uncomfortable. I thought her point about using poetry to create a little bit of distance between the reader and the situation was good, but I think it works better on the page than on the audiobook.
The idea of writing a novel like this in free verse is an intriguing one, and I think she does a good job of using different words to describe things that really preserve Angel's innocence as a character. If she had been throwing around words like, "whore" and "slut," the book would have had a very different feel. Instead, the focus is on "Angel" and "girl," words with connotations of goodness and innocence.

I enjoyed Hoilland's work a lot more, to be totally honest. Perhaps her situation and questions were more relatable to me. I loved her mini personal essay on page 20 about becoming a woman and her relationship with her mother. The language she uses is both casual and descriptive, and very emotive. The theme of Heavenly Mother that is present throughout her work is beautifully addressed. It's a very good job of sharing her opinions without them seeming preachy.

Henry Leavitt/Hoiland post

During the interview with Martine Leavitt I was struck by her answer when someone asked her about the symbolism in her book. Leavitt said that in her writing, in this book at least, that she never thought about the symbolism she used. She basically never wrote about something thinking that it would be perfect symbolism for something for specific. For some reason I really appreciated that about this book because when I first read it I felt that it was so packed with symbolism. I understand that it still can be packed with symbolism, but it was cool that Leavitt didn't intend for a lot of it to be interpreted that way. 

In One Hundred Birds Taught me to Fly, I noticed one passage that I felt really connected to the author with. On page 43 there's a passage that reads "there were no rules dictating the way we could feel awe; there was no instance that each had to be an active church member to feel the way that God loves us all-we felt that love in the space not where religion meets religion, but in the space where our stories unfold to each other." I guess I just felt like I totally understood what the author was saying. My own view of faith in today's church is so reliant on everyone's stories coming together and building each other up. I am excited to keep reading and see how this book continues to talk about the journey of faith.

Ana's Martine Leavitt / Hoiland Response

As I was reading My Book of Life by Angel, I thought it was interesting that throughout the book she would bring up Milton’s Paradise Lost, as well as some biblical imagery. Before the interview, I thought that had contributed to the form (as Paradise Lost is an epic poem, and Angel seemed to enjoy him a lot); however, she brought up that the form provided a distance between the story and he readers (as she’s broken, and writing to herself, it gives her voice). As I was reading, I found myself cringing in certain parts because of the struggles, and feeling sad for Angel. She didn’t make it graphic as she could’ve, so I wasn’t focused with the specifics, but, instead, Angel’s perception and feelings were present for me. I also liked, going back to the interview, that through poetry, she was able to tell the truth in the way she presented her story.  

In One Hundred Birds Taught Me to Fly, on pg. 70, her mission companion tells her “we are not here to save them, we are only here to minister to them.” Throughout the first 1/3 of the book she contemplates saving and what it means to be “lost.” As she does so, she is vulnerable, as she talks about her own family and some of the people she met throughout her life (for example, marriage, divorce, and death). That vulnerability helps shape her character and the story.